Almost everyday this past week, God's been softening my heart to things I need to change and hand over to Him. Such things as anger, frustration, bitterness, dislike, fear, selfishness, vulnerability. He came to me through scripture, song lyrics, people. It felt like from all sides, I was being yelled at to change-- being shown how flawed I am. And so Sunday night rolls around and I feel like a wreck. I see all my brokenness and pride and start to not like who I am. I began to have a - minor - meltdown. I spiraled into this pit of despair and let the devil tell me how worthless and unlovable I am, but at the time I believed all these lies.
After talking to a very wise person yesterday I started to make sense of my trials and a picture formed in my mind. I kept crying out: How do I change? Where do I begin? How can I make all these transformations? Am I beyond repair? And THAT is truly where the problem lies because I don't do ANYTHING besides take the grace, righteousness and peace that God so willingly and graciously wants to give me! He's standing there right in front of me with arms wide open, hands wide open with these supernatural gifts overflowing. Tears are streaming down His face as He tenderly says, "Oh beautiful, beautiful child of mine take my gifts and I'll take the rest, I'll do the rest! I'll take your pain and I'll bear your fear! I'll make the changes and I'll transform you to be more like me! Just take my gifts of love."
We are not perfect because we are sinners. But He is perfect with perfect love that covers all of my imperfections. We cannot obtain grace and righteousness on our own so we must learn to accept His.
ACCEPT HIS GRACE.
